Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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