I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
