is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
