Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
