Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Randomize
