I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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