who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I need to sanitize my soul.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
