she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
