I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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