Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
i dont even know how to be here
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
