Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
