I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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