I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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