In the future we'll all be gay
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
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