You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
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