ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
