I wish I only lived at night.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
