i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
