I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
we should paint friendship bongs
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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