I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I understand Curling. That high.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
