Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
