Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Randomize
