ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
