I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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