good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
