Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(281): View more from Texas

Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.

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(248): View more from Michigan

I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.

(1-248): View more from Michigan

Totally get that.

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(817): View more from Texas

I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.

(512): View more from Texas

Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.

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(240): View more from Maryland

I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods

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(973): View more from New Jersey

I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.

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