All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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