tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
