FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
