butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
