I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
