Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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