I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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