just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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