he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
