Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
