Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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