their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
