Tell her she can't have a vagina
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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