the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
