We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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