Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize