i don't like sucking hair
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Life without a bra equals bliss.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
