that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
