I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Randomize
