I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Randomize
