Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
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