If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
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