Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
