I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Randomize
