john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
